You are a gift from God! Yes, you should tell your girl child that! Parents cherish their bouncing babies which are God-given gifts. Whether a boy or a girl, every child is a gift from God and should be treated with love and affection and raised in a loving surrounding.
As a parent, you may notice that baby girls tend to be drawn to their dads more than their mothers. This is because daughters, by nature, crave connection with their fathers and include cherishing emotional and physical affection from their fathers. Despite this, there’s a very strong bond between a baby and her mother. A bond that is initiated while still in the womb.
Since the girl child is connected to both parents, when you raise her with the right attitude about life, she will live to remember your words forever; regardless of you being her father or mother. What you teach your girl child is very crucial to her survival on this planet, as we will learn in this article.
Setting a foundation for your girl child
Take for example, why are there religious differences? Someone may say they were raised in a so and so religion, and when you look at them, indeed, their faith seems unshaken. This is because their parents laid a strong religious foundation in them; which ensured their unshaken faith despite their age.
There’s an age when your girl child needs your full attention as a parent. You may indeed tell her you love and care for her, but this is not enough!
As she grows, you need to find out the different thoughts that run through her mind, how she feels about herself and everything, and how she is when she’s with her friends. Talking with your girl child is a crucial part of her growing stage as your words will mold her thinking or break her.
There are things you should tell your girl child as she grows and are foundational in her life journey. They are as follows:
1. “There is God who you can trust”
Irrespective of your religion, you should teach your daughter of the existence of God; a Supernatural Being who created and cares for us. Tell her that God is our father and that she can trust Him with any personal issue. Building your girl’s faith and trust in God is important for her spiritual growth; like a balanced diet is for her health and growth.
Tell her that God created rules and laws for her happiness. Obeying these laws results in happiness and life; and breaking them to sadness, punishment, and even death. Knowing this will save her from a lot of trouble and bad behavior as soon as you start to tell her of right and wrong.
2. “You can trust me as your parent”
Children by nature trust their parents from the first day they utter their first cry. They trust you they are safe, secure, will eat, and so on. But, as they grow up, circumstances may occur within their surrounding that may taint their trust in you. When trust is broken, they fear disclosing their little secrets to their parents as they grow up.
This can sometimes be the fear of either both parents or one. There are scenarios where the girl child is very open to their fathers than mothers, or vice-versa.
This can be caused by you not being there for her, or being there physically but not fully connected to her.
Always be there for your girl child
As a parent, you should make sure you are there physically, emotionally, and spiritually too. When you are absent because of work, always call back home and speak to all your family members. This creates a bond as you encourage your daughter to disclose her daily events.
When she tells you about a confrontation she had with her teacher or classmate, avoid getting angry and be a good listener. Correct, encourage, and support her throughout her growth. Show love to her every day through your actions. As she grows up, she will learn to trust you with her little secrets.
3. “Be trustworthy my girl child”
Your girl child can trust you but can you trust her? Can she be trusted by her friends? Tell your girl child, that it is important that she learn to be trustworthy. This is easier said than done since being an example is more effective. The girl child is very connected to their fathers but imitates their mothers more.
When your child hears you spilling your friend’s secrets to your neighbor, she will fail to understand the importance of trust.
Let her know what reliable means and tell her not to spill other people’s (who trust her) secrets to others. As your girl child grows up, tell her the true meaning of a true friend, and how to keep one.
4. “Not everyone can be trusted”
As you tell her about trust, it is essential that you tell her that not everyone can be trusted. She should know that apart from you, her parent, and her brothers and sisters, she should not trust anyone with their personal secrets or stuff. It is important that you tell your girl child about the concept of the good and bad touch.
She should not fully trust her uncles, grandpa, her best friend’s brother, or close friends.
Watching the news broadcast together as a family is important. This will help her learn the dangers of trusting the wrong person. This can include extended family members. Broadcasts on child kidnapping, sexual assault, food poisoning, etc will open their eyes to why trust matters.
5. “Be careful when around boys”
As their trust in you grows, you should teach them how to compose themselves when around boys and how to be cautious of the kind of things she does with them. You should give your girl child in-depth teaching on how their body works, including their sex organs and the dangers of early sex.
Don’t discourage her from having boyfriends, but tell her the dangers of allowing the boys to touch their private parts.
Biblical lessons and stories will greatly build a sure and firm foundation that will save her from a lot of trouble in her teen years, courtship, and in her marriage. At this tender age, you should train her to be bold and firm to say “no: when they mean it. No to stealing, kissing, hugging with boys, sex, etc. as long as it is wrong and sinful.
6. “You’re beautiful my girl child”
As she watches her mother put on makeup, she will start doing the same for fun. She may put on earrings or paint her nails for fun. Although this may seem a child play, let her know that she is beautiful and that no amount of make-up will make her be beautiful than she actually is. While doing this, it is important that you emphasize the fact that the inside beauty matters too.
Train her on virtues which are admired on a woman. This includes intelligence, honesty, humbleness, caring for others, empathy, kindness, among others. You can use Biblical examples and stories to help them understand the dangers of being proud or looking down on others. Train her to be clean, smart, and observant, and to learn to analyze the different situations in life positively. One way of teaching her to be humble, love, and care for others is by letting her have a pet, feed birds, and water plants, or have a garden of her own.
7. “Be healthy and clean”
Now that your girl child knows she is beautiful, tell her she should care for herself and her belongings. Train her on a healthy diet and hygiene by encouraging her to eat and observe a balanced diet, washing her underwear, clothes, and body as well. If she’s still struggling with bedwetting, assist her emotionally and encourage her to be clean.
8. “Respect yourself and others”
There’s a saying in Africa that goes: “respect me, and I respect you.” This concludes that if you want people to respect you, you should respect them in return. Train your girl child on the need to be respectful to their agemates and grown-ups too. Respect goes with being appreciative and kind. Teach her to say “thank you” where appropriate.
9. “Be careful with words”
Words can build and destroy. She should the importance of her words and the effect they can have on her and others. Tell her that speaking negatively about herself and her events will only make things worse and hard for her. She should embrace positivity towards her dreams and goals and pursue them with the right attitude.
As she grows, tell her that negative words about their friends will only create enmity and hatred, which will always result to her hurt.
There are many things you can tell your girl child as she grows up. I felt these are very foundational to any girl and will result in a positive, focused, and successful young girl.
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